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Comic commentary.

It's time for a yearly convention of snack carts in Ponyville (and of course, the Apples are in on the act).

Pinkie Pie begs for Twilight's help to keep her away from Phenomnomenas, "Noms", the ULTIMATE snack treat that is the one sugar bomb that's too much for even Pinkie's stomach.

The problem is that every time they arrived, Pinkie Pie stuffs herself with them to the point of being ill!

So this year Twilight keeps Pinkie Pie inside the castle. First she tries aversion therapy, ice water and snapping with a rubber band, but all this dose is trigger the WANT.

Twilight drags Pinkie Pie back before she snag the prize with a safety harness.

"You'll thank me later."


"Thanks Twilight, hey you were right." *Pinky points at 'Later' box'

Spike, "What is she pointing at?"

Next Twilight goes for chains and locks. Pinkie has a 'prison party' and she hears the jingle from the Noms cart . . . and Pinkie Pie's forth wall breaking power go wonky as she breaks out and turns her escape into a board game the reader could play in theory.

Twilight snags her with her magic and takes her back.

BTW: I just want to say, that Pinkie Pie's nonsense speak and backwards logic REALLY REALLY are turned up to 11 this issue, but given what Pinkie is struggling with, it's likely stress.

And Pinkamena is here.

Pinkamena wants Noms.

Twilight, "You want them, but you really want is to be free of the power they hold over you."

Pinkamena answers that no, she really really REALLY wants the Noms!

Pinkamena says some unfriendly words to Twilight for keeping her away from the Noms.

Twilight invents a kooky complex machine to try to use Pinkie Pie's boundless energy against her. Twilight is in her lab coat and is looking mental.

But when Pinkie Pie figure that if she 'wins' she gets to have the Noms, she breaks out.

Pinkie Pie begins to stuff her face.

Twilight tries one to see what the big deal is.  And . ..  

"No talk! More eat!" Twilight says in the treat's sway as well.

A panel of a pac man parody of snacking down.

Then Twilight with a big belly is disgusted at herself.

"How can something so painful look so good?" Twilight says looking at the delicious treats.

Pinkie responds. "They say you forget the pain. But the pain won't forget me. I'll name it Bulragaurd and feed it more Noms!"

The next or second panel later, is Pinkie Pie not looking happy at all, but still eating. "Bulragaurd! How could you do this to me!?"

The two mares (the two most cute and pretty and frilly ponies you've ever seen) who run the stand NEVER say a word the entire issue. Not one.
Now, at first you can't really blame them, they're just selling a treat, they can't be blamed if Pinkie Pie is filing their coffers by buying a ton of them.
But then they begin to show signs of actively ENCOURAGING Pinkie Pie to continue to stuff her face (and fill their cash bags), regardless of how it's clear that she's doing this as an involuntary addiction. (They're the ones who make the choice to continue to serve Pinkie Pie when it's clear that their product is NOT doing her any good at this point.)

Twilight is broken in that she FAILED Pinkie Pie, but it finally hits Twilight . . . Only Pinkie Pie can stop Pinkie Pie.

So Twilight tells Pinkie Pie she gives up. Pinkie (who doesn't look cute at all with the crumbs and stuffed cheeks at all) asks what's wrong, maybe she and Bulragaurd can help.

Pinkie Pie tells Twilight that Twilight being irrational isn't in character for her, dramatics are Pinkie and Rarity's department.

Twilight tells Pinkie Pie how SHE needs to be one to decide not to eat the Noms.

This causes Pinkamena to pop up again, and Pinkie shows to be going in agony in NOT a pretty way at all . . . before she finally says no to it.

Much to the cheers of many ponies around her.

Pinkie Pie says to lay off the chains and locks next time, but this feels like Pinkie Pie being weird rather her calling out Twilight.

The mares walk away from the snack stands, while the last panel is out Spike indulging in a bunch of sapphire pretzels.
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So the special opens with being winter in the human world, and Sunset says how she wasn't close to her family before coming here, and now she isn't close to anyone, and has been alone for the holidays for these years.

AJ decides they'll have a sleep over conga line for Sunset counting down to the holidays, and the girls agree.

And RD lampshades that we've never met Fluttershy's family.

At Pinkie Pie's  we're also introduced to MyStable, (FaceBook parody) a social websites that's popular. Maud Pie makes cameos via user comments, and it fits her.

And Sunset says magical burping dragons is the closet thing they have to social networking.

Fluttershy resists playing video games at first, then literally has fire in her eyes as she says she'll destroy all of her enemies! (0-0). This is after she's introduced to the Twisted Metal parody, and the cut fuzzy bunny that drives s monster truck.

RD eventually has to 'unplug' her as she begins talking to her after stopping playing the game and going, "Use your limit break Mr. Fuzzy."

Sunset asks if this is what they do at sleep overs (-_- She had one with Twilight Sparkle, dumb writers).

Bloom calls over to make sure everything is okay because Granny Smith is worried, and say she's just the messenger, and uses human AJ's nick name 'Piggy Wiggy' apparently she played with the pigs in the pig pen a lot when AJ was little. (That isn't how real pig acts . . .). But it's a nickname only used between family, and is meant as a 'don't be so full of yourself AJ' message.

The next day . . . people know AJ's nick name.

Thanks to a new MyStable Account "Miss-Amon-A".

Applebloom suggests the rumor monger is Sunset, after all, the user page matches her color scheme and she heard about AJ's nick name just last light. AJ throws it off, Sunset is her friend.

Then comes Rarity's party, and Sweetie Belle is unceremoniously shoved out of the room in spite of wanting to party with the big girls.

Pinkie Pie ends up crashing into Rarity's rejected-projects closet.

The girls decide to do some photos for the fun of it using the rejects as costumes.

The girls ask Sunset if her phone has been lost or stolen. Sunset says no. Then they ask to explain how Sunset's photo of them at Rarity's party ended up on the rumor monger's user page! And Rarity is humiliated.

The look on Sunset's face as she defends herself that is not the rumor monger is heart breaking.

But the evidence speaks for itself, and the girls abandon Sunset, who is crying her eyes out.

It's also, rather painfully shown Sunset has been using the same trick as Twilight for somewhere to sleep . . . okay, FOR FOUR YEARS?! SERIOUSLY? THAT'S INSANE! And why didn't they run into each other in the top of the library then!? Sorry. That's bad writing!!!!

Sunset goes to Trixie, fully convinced she's the rumor monger! Trixie laughs in her face, saying Trixie wishes she WAS (-_-) since it's gotten the school so revved up, and Trixie thought it was Sunset.

Including a picture of Rainbow Dash getting a "D. Very poor, see me." Written by the teacher, on an assignment, and she MISSPELLED THE TITLE of the assignment.

The rumor monger's page only gets worse. And the teasing of the girls does too.

Fluttershy HAD TO RUN to the animal shelter to avoid teasing. Rarity wearing clothing like she's hiding. And AJ has to deal with piggy drawing tapped onto her locker.

Oh, and of course, Diamond, Trixie, and Silver of course HAVE TO be faving Miss Amon A's posts.

But suddenly. Not just the mane six are targeted anymore.

Diamond Tiara, "I know you took my necklace! Miss Amon A posted a picture of you wearing it!"

Silver Spoon, "So what! It never looked good on you anyway!"

(Gee, something that DOESN'T have to do with them being trouble makers).

It gets ugly.

It becomes Canterlot High Divided Part Three! ANd it's every bit as depressing and miserable as the first two times!

Via the spell book, Twilight and Sunset discuss if there could versions of the Human Version of the Windigos in the human world, (even showing a picture of such creatures) but they say how there doesn't NEED TO BE, "anyone can spread chaos and hatred" (reminds me of Oristed's line Live A live where he says anyone can become a king of demons as long as there is hatred).  "Especially when all it takes is a push of a button."

Sunset is ganged up on students after she trips and falls, some begging her to take down a secret because they'll be grounded for life if it gets out, another wants her to post MORE, others think she's horrible, some think it's funny, and Sunset is breaking down at the horror. The student with glowing white eyes . . . (Mighty just be a hallucination of Sunset's from the stress she's going through being seen as a rumor monger).

Finally, Sunset decides that her friends AREN'T just friends, they're FAMILY, and goes to them . . . they are NOT happy to see her and want to see her GONE, but she says how they're not just friends, they're family (remembers words she shared with Twilight via the book before). And asks if Sunset, the Sunset they know and love, who they helped become a better person, would ever do these things as she is NOW.

The question remains who the real Miss Amon A is . . .  Sunset realizes there was only one group of individuals who were below the radar and would have been able to see everything they saw and did and managed to get RD's poor grade papers, with the junior soccer team practicing at the same time as her own team when she had her home work.

The CMC arrive and beat them to the punch, they're Miss Amon A.


Variables and constants. Variables and constants.

Sorry Rarity, it seems it IS your sister's destiny to spread horrible gossip at one stage in her life!

The girls were jealous of Sunset eating up time with their big sisters, themselves being dismissed . . .

But they never meant for things to get out of hand like this . . . people began posting gossip and secrets to Miss Amon A's user page all on their own. The girls confess to posting it all.

They BEG for forgiveness  . . . and this STILL being my little pony . . . the girls forgive them.

They also confess to Principle Celestia and end up with six months detention. (Ironic given what they did technically didn't violate any school rule, yes it was horrible and needed to be punished, but still, grounded for six months might have made more sense).

But while they DID take down the Miss Amon A page . . .the damage is done, stuff they posted has been reposted elsewhere, and is beyond their ability to stop.

AJ says her and her friends will just have to deal with some of their secrets out, it's not the end of the world.

They girls themselves apologize for neglecting the CMC, and happily spend time with them now, explaining the beauty of family is that there's always room for one more.
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In the back rooms of the studio, Coffee Swirl grumbled about Security cameras that hadn't been there a moment before. Couldn't that dumb wolf do its job right?

Stupid mares . . . then again, there again, there were ponies who thought he was one bad day from snapping, like the ponies who had once tried to 'disable' Rainbow Dash, and the Sparkle siblings.

In the actual stuido room, Rainbow Dash and Rarity looked at each other.

"Daring, why are you all looking at a blank screen?"

"Yeah it's getting kinda weird. And what's that letter? And WHY is it blank?"

"I admit it is rather strange what you're doing . . . " Octavia admitted. "And are you speaking with thin air?" She wasn't able to see Snow Bound.

Photo nodded, "If this is that kind of paper, I can order some extra concentrated salt."

"That won't be needed." Maud said.

Hooves scuffed the carpet beside Twilight, where there had been only empty space before.  "How can you enjoy this?" asked Snow Bound, his gruff voice sounding honestly perplexed.  "The end of this world was the beginning of our own.  You, your friends, your Equestria... none of them exist there, or ever will exist."

"What, are we trading questions now?" said Twilight, a little rattled.  She took a deep, calming breath.  "I wouldn't want to stop existing so that world could live again, but it is a lovely world, and it's really special to Pinkie... isn't that enough?"  She smiled.  "What does it matter to you?  I mean, you'd still be around even if...  oh."

The odd white stallion nodded.  "The Blank Wolf was created so that nothing like the Disaster could ever happen again...  That is your answer in trade, if we are keeping score."

Twilight smirked.  "Score?  No one even told me the rules."

Snow Bound glared at the screen again.  "I do not like the idea that I was created on account of some... mistake, which could have simply not been made in the first place.  It's too good to be true... there must be some flaw.  Nothing mortal endures..."  He trailed off, seeing Pinkie giving him that look.

Not-Maud looked to the Blank Wolf. "It's true the Disaster had a role in making the Blank Wolf...but isn't it also true Morning Star made Persecution due to the same thing?"

"...That is true."

"...Starlight and her world CHOSE to sacrifice themselves to make that world how it is. It is true it is not a world without death and suffering. That is the truth. But it is also a world without Persecution, and without EVIL. It's a world of innocents and kindness. "

"That still meant it required sacrifice to exist..."

"...And is that wrong?" Not-Maud asked. "Would it be fair to Starlight and her friends to undo the sacrifice they willingly made just for their sake when it created a genuine world without evil?"


"...You exist to serve, you exist to sacrifice.  So why complain about the sacrifices others have made?"

Maud hugged Pinkie and the two turned back to the screen.

Coffee Swirl's argument had continued off-screen for quite some time now, mostly him either refuting or outright rejecting the points that the ghosts of his sword -- likely more in the know than him -- made against his worldview. Squire in particular seemed baffled as to why he didn't just throw away the sword, given said worldview.

'How can thou stand for the highest virtues, when thou dost not believe they exist!?'

Swirl opened his mouth to respond to the pony only he could hear, when he was interrupted by Logan.

'I think we've gotten a bit off-track here.'

'Yeah,' Patch said. 'This whole thing started because you need to apologize to Fluttercruel, not a debate about morality and worldviews.'

"So I'm stalling, sue me. I don't know how to talk to girls."

'Gee, thanks.'

"Oh shut up, Patch. You're in my head, you KNOW what I mean."

'Swirl, I know this will come as a shock to you, but mares are not some sort of mysterious and eldritch creatures! Hay, you already know she likes you! Just go out there, say you're sorry and that's all there is to it!'

"Have you not paid any attention to what sort of world we live in? It's NEVER that simple!"

Patch gave a frustrated groan. 'I am starting to wonder just what she actually sees in you!'

'I think we're going about this the wrong way.' In contrast to the other two, Logan seemed to be perfectly calm... which had Swirl fidgeting nervously.

Suddenly, pain shot up from his shoulder. "What the buck?!"

'Phantom pain,' Logan said. 'You're not really hurt, just feels like you are; go talk to Fluttercruel and it'll stop.'

"This is bullying."

'No, bullying is when you do it for sadistic pleasure; I'm not enjoying this, but it gets you to do something.'

"Jerk..." Swirl muttered.

'Yeah, yeah, I'm a jerk. Now, get moving.'

Pain flared again, forcing the pony to his feet and back out of the side room. The pain didn't lessen, even as he got closer to the Flutters. "Hey... we need to talk."

He had walked out of the back room, and had tapped on the shoulder.

"Hello Sir Runs A Lot."

" . . . I'm sorry."

". . . Will you not do it again?"

"I'll . . . try my hardest not to."

She grabbed him, kissed him, and they wrapped their wings around each other as they took to the ceiling. Rarity politely put some cloths over the cameras.

Applejack sighed.

Swirl broke the kiss for just a moment. "I hate to ask, but does this make us officially a couple."
"Yes it does!" Pinkie Pie called out from where she stood beside Maud, presenting her with her own secret recipe Marble Pound Cake. It was a magnificent piece of pastry, layered in rich frosting. "I hope you like it, Maud. I made it just the way you like it!"

"My," Rarity said, trying and failing to not drool at the sight and smell of the cake. "But that does look delightful, Pinkie Pie." The same greedy little demon that once drove her to sample the Cakes' hoof-made creation on that trip a year ago began to rise within her. A hint of Greedity entering her eyes, she said, "Would it be possible to have just one teensy little taste?"

"Yeah," Dash said, flying over. She openly licked her lips. "Just own bite. Hey, it takes a lot of energy to fly, I need to keep my strength up."

"Uh, I don't think so, Rarity," Pinkie said, looking wary. "This is a cake for family-only, unicorns and pegasus-uses can't really handle it."

"Pinkie!" The pink party pony turned away as Octavia called out, "Do you remember that one song Grandma used to sing for us? You know, 'She was Bread in Old Appaloosa, but she's just a Crumb up here'?"

"Oooh you mean about Auntys Crumb? Sure, I remember it." She hopped over.

"I'm coming to," Maud said as she took one look at the greedy gaze in the face of both Dash and Rarity. Something like a smile tugged at her lips as she said, "You might need help with it."

Dash and Rarity grinned at each other.

"Just one taste won't ruin the party."

"Of course not, darling." Both ponies looked at the cake, licking their lips. It just looked so delicious. "On one, two, three!"

Twin whinnies of pain came to Pinkie where she stood with Octavia and Maud. All three looked to see Rarity and Dash hopping up and down in pain, hooves clutched to their jaws.

"Oooh!" Pinkie yelled. "Did I forget to say that the Marble Pound Cake is made with real marbles? Your favorites too, Maud."

And somewhere in Ponyville a zebra named Bardeeya smiled. "Be tested by Temptation, mares, and pass or suffer. Just be glad it wasn't over a stallion."

"So . . . did you mom want to try some?" Coffee Swirl asked from up near the ceiling.

Fluttercruel shook her head. "No actually. She said she was done with such things. She said it feel too much like New Fluttershy if she took a bite without permission. And she remembered the dream she had where she had to perform at Sugar Cube corner as a clown for a month to pay off a cake that she ruined in her dreams and was banned for a year. But . . . now she wants to check on her friends. Even if they did it to themselves and I think the pain would be good for them."

Coffee Swirl stopped . . . he had been in the middle of remembering the proper hoof steps and wing flaps to the sacred time honored pegasi mating dance. Coffee Swirl was many things, but he was still a red blooded pegasi.

Coffee Swirl landed stretching his wings and legs.

Photo Finish meanwhile shouted, "HOLD THAT POSE! The pain! The humiliation! The embarrassment!" He took several shots of the pegasus and unicorn.

"You two got what ya deserved," AJ said simply. "And seriously, YA BOTH SHOULDDA KNOWN BETTER!!!! Ah mean a marble cake fer rock farmers?!"

"I thought Maud was inviting us to try some I swear!" Rarity said in pain.

"Now is there anything in here for sore teeth? Hmm, maybe I should just take you both to Mineutte? But then you'd miss the rest of the party."

"Want some more marble cake?" Maud Pie said emotionlessly and no visible expression, but she was laughing her head off inside.  

The two shook her head desperately.

Maud Pie had a slice and ate the marble cake with real marbles with no ill effects. She was an earth pony rock farmer.

AJ looked around, and it seemed Snow Bound had popped away again. She wished one of his 'see you later's actually WAS a later instead of a 'soon after.' That dang wolf didn't seem to know how to properly say bye. Oh well, maybe this time he'd be busy erasing annoying uninspired perfect characters in Hoofington or something. She hoped Trixie was doing well.

Twilight, on a soap box, was giving Rarity and Rainbow Dash 'The Lecture' on respecting other ponies' warnings, "AND RARITY!!! WHAT HAPPENS TO PROPER TABLE MANNERS?! YOU SHOULD HAVE KNOWN BETTER!"

The What If Machine almost felt relieved . . . it had been so long since it had been allowed to just rest. It actually felt nice.

Maud Pie gave it a short glance, "We are watching the rest of Pinkie Pie, Minty, and Rocky Road's day together before the party ends, understood?"

"Yes. Perfectly."

"Don't worry girls, I think I have some 'anti-tooth candy in here somewhere." Pinkie Pie said pulling various sweets right out of her mane.

"Pinkimena, I doubt that's very sanitary." Octavia suggested.

"The worst that could happen is that they'd get Pinkie Germs and act like me forever." She grinned and took other a candy.  

Rarity and RD took a step back, their teeth still hurting.

"HA! Gotcha on that one! I actually had you going!" Pinkie Pie laughed. "Crossing my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye, there's no such thing as Pinkie Germs."
The What-If Machine glitched, throwing a few sparks and smelling vaguely like burnt cinnamon toast.  "Error, time sync lost.  Attempting to compensate."  The screen lit up...

Back in the other Ponyville on that other world, a hedge maze had been raised on the outskirts of town.  A large banner near the entrance read "Ponyville Pie Fight Championship, final round today!"

Spooky Tail and Rocky Road were there at the front of the crowd, watching the some of the action on the magical globes that Rose Quartz had conjured.  They had a few more wrinkles, but they were otherwise in good health.  "Thrilling!" said Spooky.  "You've outdone yourself, dear."

"Hehe!  Thanks, dad!" said Rose Quartz, a young adult mare now.  She'd insisted that her maze cutie mark was just a coincidence, but if her special talent literally was making mazes, what of it?  Everypony loved the fun amazing fun games she thought up that they could play in the hedge maze.

Star Song flew higher, shading her eyes with a hoof.  "Oh look!  More of them are coming out!"

A grown-up Flint Spark led the way, grinning like a shark, even though she'd taken a pie to the face.  "That was awesome!  Let's do it again!"

Fire Cracker, Toola-Roola, Sugar Rush, and Pinkie Pie followed her, so plastered in pie filling that ponies could hardly tell one from another.  "You'll have to wait for them to bake more pies," said Sugar Rush.  "Even Sweetie Belle and Butter Fry can only make 'em so fast."  He looked all around.  "Huh, where are they?"

Pinkie Pie shook all the pie filling off herself in an instant and hopped over to one of the globes.  "They're not here because they're the last two in the game!"

Nopony had quite known what to make of Butter Fry's cutie mark when it showed up.  A pair of six-sided dice wasn't so strange... but one of them had no spots on the top face, and the other had seven.

The young unicorn stallion grinned toothily as he crept around a corner of the maze, two pies held in his magic.  "I've got you..."  He sprang, pies ready to hurl, but found only a dead end with a table stacked with spare pies.  Hooves stepped on the grass behind him.  "Nuts!"

Sweetie Belle had him cornered.  Worse, the white and purple mare had one of those clockwork contraptions that Rose had stashed around the maze, made to fling pies one after another with the touch of a trigger.  "Okay, banana nut pies it is!"

A sudden wild inspiration struck Butter Fry.  He grinned... he'd learned to go with those first, and think about them later.  The grey unicorn dodged left, then right, pies barely missing him.  He flung the two pies he had, then lunged backwards, bucking the table and guiding the launched pies with his magic.  Amazingly, every pie smacked another pie in midair, knocking both away.

He snatched the one pie he had left, ready to throw, and suddenly realized that he was back to back with Sweetie Belle, who also held one last pie in *her* magic.  "Look, a three-headed monkey!"

Sweetie Belle blinked.  "What's a... hey!"

They pied each other in the face simultaneously and fell down in a heap, laughing.

"I haven't had that much fun in eons," cried Butter Fry, still laughing away.  "Well, not literally eons, obviously.  I don't know why I say things like that..."

Sweetie Belle caught his gaze, giggling again.  "You have something on your face..."

By the time Sweetie Belle and Butter Fry finally exited the maze, Pinkie Pie was practically bouncing in place, waiting to hear how it had gone.  "Well?  Well, well?  Who won?"

"He did." "She did." said both of them at once, and then Sweetie Belle blushed, and Butter Fry smiled and looked away shyly.

Spooky blinked and started forward, but Rocky Road stopped him, shaking her head.

"You know how he can be," said Spooky quietly.  "He might hate us for this later."

"He won't," was all Rocky Road said.


Her muzzle twitched in an almost-smile.  "Spoilers, dear."
Pinkie Pie's 4th Wall Breaking Show epi 10 Part 14
Pony POV Series 
Pinkie Pie's 4th Wall Breaking Variety Show episode 10
By Alex Warlorn

Pinkie Pie, "Good news . . . the author has his notes now together, bad news, his editor is juggling three jobs so it's taking an extra super long time to get the edits done. But you know . . . maybe we can wrap this up this chapter? . . . Nothing last forever . . . but maybe that's not so bad . . . and I know we might have time again before the finale of the entire series . . . let's see where things go. I love you Maud, you too Octy and Shoots.

Parts added by:
Alex Warlorn
Dragon Of Twilight
Alex Warlorn
Dragon Of Twilight
Ardashir and Alex Warlorn

Pinkie Pie, "At least we're finally making progress .  . . here's Da Rule":
1. What you put in the comments appears in the story.
2. Nopony besides me can see beyond the fourth wall or interact with it and I can't spill the beans about us being out-and-out fiction to the others.
3. The camera can’t leave the studio.
4. The characters can be from any generation, toy or comic but they have to be from “My little Pony”
5. Everything that happens here is non-canon (except the Tartarus break out thingie, but not the big battle).
6. Have Fun "

Cover by Kendell2
MLP FiM Copyright of Hasbro
When Twilight's friends had come over for their scheduled 'Council Of Friendship Meeting' (just really an excuse to socialize and have fun), they were surprised when Twilight 'checklists for checklists' Sparkle wasn't there to greet them with Spike on the dot. Spike said Twilight had research that had run a little long, though even the baby dragon seemed a tad concerned. But the girls only had to wait for a short while until Twilight stepped out of the castle.

Twilight Sparkle looked around at her friends, and sighed. "Fine, let's hear it."

"Uh, hear what Sugar Cube?" AJ asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Whatever it's going to turn out to be today, let's just hear it. One of you is secretly a serial killer?"

"How do you kill cereal?" Pinkie Pie asked.

"Uh, daring, are you feeling well?" Rarity asked, noting the rarely said word 'killer'. The word killed was one rarely tossed about, the only time in recent memory it was relevant to them was when King Sombra had been obliterated by the Crystal Heart, but the only tears shed for the dark tyrant's death were those for a lost soul.

"You're part of a massive conspiracy that silences and eliminates anypony or anything that might upset the status quo of Equestria, only answerable to yourselves?"

"That sounds kinda cool, but no," Rainbow Dash said.

"NO IT ISN'T!" Twilight snarled. "It's a mockery of everything Equestria was meant to be! Everything it's supposed to be!"

"Uh...okay?" Dash flew back some. Twilight's composure had slipped for a brief moment and that was enough to make Dash shudder.

" let's move on. You're social opportunists who were using me from the start?"

Rarity shook her head. "Darling, as much as I always look for a chance to expand my business connections: when we first met I helped you with your mane like I would ANY pony. And I went into Everfree because Fluttershy was, and because I wasn't about to let somepony from outside of Ponyville just wander blindly through Everfree."

"And really," Pinkie Pie said, "That really doesn't make much sense. Remember how we all buttered you up trying to get those Gala tickets? I think that's about the ONLY time we really ALL acted like that. And we probably would have done that to anypony we knew with tickets. Sure, Dashie moonlighted with the Wonderbolts during the Equestrian Games, and Rarity two-timed us and lied to us on your birthday so she could socialize with the fancy ponies more, but neither of those really had anything to do with you."

RD and Rarity lowered their heads some.

"So is Equestria at a war that'll make a mockery of all our non-lethal methods of fighting, and have us all slaughtered unless we're MORE savage and cold-blooded on the battlefield than the enemy?"

"Um, not last time I checked, uh, no," Fluttershy said.

"Last 'war' we had was with the Changelings and nopony died," Rainbow Dash pointed out. "And that was when we got ambushed."

"Are we under occupation of sexist monsters who have brainwashed all the male into being sexist monsters too and broken us mares into slaves and sawed off our horns?"

"Um, Twilight, do you have a fever? Why don't we go inside? Please?" Fluttershy put a hoof to Twilight's forehead.

Twilight shook her off. "Answer the question."

"No," AJ said with a stern face, feeling extra disgusted at that one. Spike shook his head too. Rarity pointed at her own horn wonder how Twilight had missed it.

"Sweetie Belle is a robot/demon hybrid and is going on a town rampage?"

Rarity frown deeply, not looking the least bit amused. "Now you are just being silly dear! I think I would know if that was true!"

"Did Celestia changed her name to Molestia and abuses me and her servants?"

Spike frowned and pointed. "Twilight you should know better than anypony that was just garbage those journalist printed to sell their stupid tabloids."

"So is Celestia secretly Tirek?"

"NO!" All her friends said together.

"We just kicked Tirek's sorry flank back to Tartarus, Twilight! You can't have forgotten that already!" Rainbow Dash pointed out in disbelief. "Remember? New castle? Epic new rainbow superpowers?"

Rainbow demonstrated by letting the blue glow shine a little bit, still loving how it felt.

Twilight breathed in deep. "So is Celestia at the top of a racist supremacist system with Alicorns at the top, then unicorns, then pegasi, then earth ponies, followed by everycreature else?"

AJ shook her head. "Twili' are ya feelin' okay? I PAY Daisy Jo and her girls for their milk! Same with the sheep and their wool! In bits! We have a contract!"

"And darling, you and I both know that elites aren't rude over species! I know I'm not a Canterlot native, but nothing I've seen suggests they base their bad attitude on race."

"Plus, racism kinda died out after the Windigos nearly destroyed pony civilization by feeding off of racial hatred, remember? The fancy historical play?" Rainbow Dash said. "And, well..." she said, pointing to everypony. "Does anypony give a darn about us all being different races?"

"Spike, have I been planning to betray my friends in some twisted selfish interpretation of harmony and become a goddess?"

"Uh, no. And Twilight, erm, you kinda already are, remember?" Spike pointed at her wings. "You're Friendship, not Harmony..."

"Okay, am I having a existential crisis over the realization that there are multiple universes, and that the choices of other Twilight Sparkles somehow negate or trivialize the choices, I, myself make?"

"Besides that freak out you had over accidentally getting some checklists out of order because you insisted on trying to read three books at once while organizing, no."

"I did NOT freak out!"

"No offense Twili, but ya do freak when things are outta order, worse than Rarity."

"I have a business to keep afloat all by my lonesome! Besides, I have my messy rooms, they just serve a purpose."

"Okay, are we stuck in an ever repeating temporal loop that will never ever be fixed, living the same time over and over, becoming all powerful to where an army of fully empowered Tireks would be a triviality for one of us to take care of while drunk? Destroying any hopes for the future because there is none rendering all that power and knowledge meaningless?"

Pinkie Pie look at a pocket watch. And then quickly whispered with Time Turner who happened to be just passing by to where he parked his blue shed.

"Nope!" Pinkie Pie said politely and cheerfully.

"Is an evil, potential future, superpowered version of myself trapping us in a timeloop to punish a villain?"

The pink party pony talked with Time Turner again. "Nope!"

"Do we have an extra-reality self-righteous visitor who none of us could hope to take on in a fight, lectures us, brow beats Princess Celestia, and leads to the reveal we live in a dead universe while we all fall for the manipulations of an equally overpowered extra-reality magic eater that can eat the Elements power when we try to use them?"

"No," Fluttershy said looking up at the sky, shivering a little.

"And we just beat a magic eater," Rainbow Dash explained. "And our big friendship powered Rainbow cannon thing seemed to kick his flank pretty nicely."

"We're all about to be turned into hedonists who see mating as something done in the name of pleasure rather than a sacred union that's meant to be preserved for marriage?"

"No way!" Applejack shook her head. "That's nuts! No offense to anypony, but Ah ain't got TIME for that sort of thing! And Big Mac and Cheerilee aren't tah the 'admit we're in love' part yet."

Fluttershy blushed deep red and hide her face behind her mane at the mere idea of being mounted by a stallion.

"Me and Cheese Sandwich aren't past the holding hooves stage yet," Pinkie Pie said.

"Me and Soarin' are just friends, besides, he'll never leave Spitfire."

Rarity also blushed. "Twilight! I can ASSURE YOU am not that kind of mare! I have a high standard for stallions."

Spike looked at himself in a mirror looking for imperfections.

"Rainbow Dash! Are you stuck in a futile loop where everything I just asked is true all at once, even though it makes no sense, and everypony else is now an empty shell for a force beyond our comprehension that loves miserable and horrible things to happen to us for no reason?"

"Twilight you're the only one acting weird. Did you not get any sleep? My life is actually about 20 percent more awesome than it was before, since you know, the Rainbow Power Form thingie. Is this like that time I, ahem, erm, sleep walked through a Daring Do dream? What kind of creepy stuff have you been reading?"

Twilight sighed. "Okay, so there's some horrible, cynical, pessimistic, ahem, excuse me, 'realistic' social truth I've been blissfully ignoring all this time because I'm a pampered filly whose completely ignorant of how the real world works?"

Her friends all looked at each other.

"Twilight," Rainbow Dash asked, "Is this about how I was a day late in returning that Daring Do book to the library? I told you I just wanted to read it over twice. I said I was sorry!"

"NO! NO! What is it? Tell me already! Tell me! I'm sick of it already! Does my brother secretly now hate all changelings whether they work for Chrysalis or not?! I can't take it anymore! Just tell me already! Are we about to be hit by a deadly virus where my years of studying magic and friendship prove useless as we die one by one?! Are any of us secretly changelings?! Am I really a mental patient and I just hallucinate I've been Celestia's student in Ponyville?! Or am I a human in one imagining ALL of this? Lies are a gift to society?! Ponies who are born poor should just smile and nod and stay poor?! Nopony's choices matter because we live in a caste system!? We're all one big computer program about to be shut down?! Or am I not the target this time? Is it Rarity because she has so many rules for herself that she needs to have her nose rubbed in them!? TELL ME ALREADY!!!! Give me the off hoofed remark that'll reveal that the truths and ideals I've fought for and learned about for the last four years are just little niceties that have no place in how life really works!" Twilight shouted at the sky. "I KNOW YOU WANT TO! Just say it already! Come on you big bullies!"

Ponies stopped on the street, worried their princess was having another break down.

Drenched in sweat, her breathing haggard, Twilight fainted.

Several hours later, Twilight Sparkle was in her bed, surrounded by her friends.

Spike had Nurse Redheart look her over as a house call, castle call, whatever. Spike had to fight tooth and nail to convince them that restraining Twilight would only make things WORSE given she had included 'hallucinating mental patient' as part of her rant.

The Alicorn slowly woke up, seeing the loving and worried faces of her friends.

"So are you ready to tell us what that was all about now darling?" Rarity asked smiling politely.

Twilight Sparkle sighed. "I was experimenting with the world mirror. Now that I can keep the portal open, regardless of the phases of Luna's moon, I figured that using a traditional 'magic looking glass' spell on it couldn't hurt."

Everypony (and dragon), sighed. Yet another disaster caused by the Princess of Friendship's magical experiments. Was it any wonder Mayor Mare requested that the castle have measures to keep Twilight's experiments from effecting the town by accident?

"Don't give me those looks. Progress and experimentation inherently has risk, that's part of life. And the vast majority of my research has HELPED ponies. . .And...and I don't put anypony at risk but myself if I can help it, unlike...I was...hoping maybe...I could find a new connection to the world with the good King Sombra that Celestia...that Celestia was best friends with. Maybe help him in a way that wouldn't cause a sympathetic-karmic-inversion in our world. After all, I was able to help with Sunset's new world without that happening, so maybe it was possible. But I wasn't just seeing alternate worlds anymore...I was seeing possibilities, I had gone past the quantum state accidentally due to how broad I set the spectrum. Then...I was seeing the shadows of thoughts, of what a lot of ponies out there THINK Equestria is like, or...their world is so full of hardship and unfairness, that a more fair world feels UNFAIR to them."

"Like how a lot bully poor Minty."

"What was that Pinkie Pie?"

"NOTHING! Continue please!"

"The point is...I lost track of myself. I couldn't tell where other worlds ended and mine began. I keep seeing it over and over, where the Equestria we've been working so hard to protect, to make just a little bit better every day of our lives, was just a farce, that everything we believed in were just polite lies to keep societies gears turning. That friendship was just a drug fed to the herds so they wouldn't rise up against their masters. There were ponies...out there...who didn't WANT our Equestria to be real, or at least, they didn't want a place where ponies like Suri and Flim and Flam were exceptions, not the norm. They wanted an Equestria were EVERYPONY was like Suri, or Lightinng Dust, or Flim and Flam, or Blueblood deep down. That it was all just polite lies. They wanted an Equestria were miracles just dumb luck instead of proof that you shouldn't give up on tomorrow or your morals because things get tough. We...we aren't the Equestria they want."

Her friends, Spike included, all hugged her.

"Well, that's too bad for them!" Rainbow Dash said.

"Yes darling," Rarity said, "If they can't enjoy a happy place without some uncouth underbelly, then that's their problem."

"There's plenty of dirty and unhappy stuff out there already. It doesn't need to be here," Pinkie Pie said.

"And Twili," Applejack said. "Do yah think yer friends in that world Sunset's stayin' in believe that stupid stuff about friendship bein' just a game?"

"...No, I don't think so..."

"Even if we didn't completely save good Sombra's world, Ah think their Princesses are a lot happier as nice gals than monsters..."

"I saw it in the mirror when I managed to view it...they were. They're trying to save Sombra..."

"Maybe there are worlds that ain't as good as they are here, maybe those ponies are happy there. But that just means we should be happier this one's real."

Pinkie Pie nodded. "Yeah! And if another me is a big meanie pants? That just means me deciding not to be is better, isn't it?"

Fluttershy gave a smile. "And...even though he fell for Tirek's temptation...Discord didn't go out of his way to hurt ponies because he could anymore. Friendship definitely means a lot to him. Friendship is anything but a happy little lie for him now."

"Ah think he's the ultimate proof what you're sayin' ain't right, Twili," Applejack pointed out.

"Yeah! Have you seen him smile when he's around Fluttershy or being nice?!" Pinkie asked, hopping over. "His smile before was all 'hahaha! look how bad I am!' but his smile when he's a good guy is all 'Oh I'm really truly happy!'"

"...I think what Pinkie is trying to say is that Discord seems a heck of a lot happier on our side," Rainbow translated. "...I hate to admit it, but I saw him cringe when he handed us over to Tirek, that ain't the old Discord..."

"And dear Trixie has changed as well," Rarity pointed out. "I don't think there's been one time we've interacted with her since the Alicorn Amulet incident where she didn't enjoy our company."

"And don't forget Babs," Applejack continued. "She's a nice little sweetheart now, and a LOT happier as the Crusaders' friend instead of their bully."

"...You're right...But what about Suri and the Flim Flams?"

"...You said it yourself, Twilight, there are some RARE ponies who aren't kind, but Suri...I believe she's become lead astray, not that she's proof of some greater darkness in this world."

"And Granny met up with the Flim Flams at an expo," Applejack admitted. "Last Ah saw them we left on good terms and they were actin' legit."

"And Lightning Dust actually THANKED me for calling her out," Rainbow Dash explained. "She wasn't a bad girl, she just needed a reality check."

Twilight blinked...then gave a small smile. "...I guess we have made the world better..."

Each of her friends looked to each other and nodded. "Even if yah don't count savin' it a few times," Applejack pointed out.

"And I'm quite glad we live in the world we do because of that dear," Rarity said with a smile. "And it's that way because it's the world we strive for, not because there's some conspiracy about it."

"And if there was, we'd kick its flank and make the world nice for real," Rainbow snarked with her characteristic smirk.

"The six most powerful magic thingies in our world are powered by Friendship, Laughter, Kindness, Honesty, Generosity, and Loyalty! Those things can't be a lie if they're that strong! That'd be too big a plot twist even for a little kids show!" Pinkie Pie cheerfully pointed out.

Fluttershy nodded. "...Choosing to be kind is a choice, Twilight...just like choosing to be long as we choose to make the world better, we don't have to worry..."

Spike finally jumped up. "And I don't know about you, but  no matter what some silly ponies say, a world were friendship saves the day? That's the world I'm glad we live in!"

"Yes," Twilight's eyes misted over. "So am I!" She sat up in bed and hugged her friends, who happily turned it into a group hug.

Outside, the crystal palace shined just a little bit brighter.
Twilight Sparkle's Frustrations
A short story of nothing. Not related to the pony pov series at all. Twilight starts asking some very strange questions to her friends.

MLP:FiM: Copyright of Hasbro

Picture by chaosdrop.
Upset Twilight V1 by ChaosDrop

20141105: Added some bits by Yoshiegg64, tell me if they fit or not.

20141217: I added a little something of a particular nasty fanfic among Twilight's questions to Rainbow Dash. 
" .  . . Why da heck is that dangnabbit contraption fancied itself up to look like a pony? It looks every more creepy!"

"Applejack that's rude!" Fluttershy said.

"No it's actually uncanny valley, and NO Pinkie Pies, that is NOT a place." Twilight lectured on her soap box. "When you make something that is ALMOST like a pony, but not QUITE like a pony, you see the traits that AREN'T like a pony, opposed to those that ARE like a pony."

Goth and Ghost Pinkie Pie looked at each other.
"I think this party should be just for Maud, HER Pinkie Pie, and THEIR friends, agreed?" Goth Pinkie asked.

"Yeah . . . we REALLY don't need to make things MORE complicated, confusing, and convoluted by being here more than we've already been. With everything set up. I say we politely bow out."

The two Pinkie Pies, not even WANTING thanks for their hard work, sneaked out a 'back door' as the ponies were focused on AJ and the what if machine. Stopping only to kiss this world's Pinkie Pie on the forehead and to give Maud Pie a hug each that she willingly returned.

"No offense darlin', but the robot look ain't ya at all." AJ said.

The what-if machine responded by continuing it's vision of loyal Shining Armor's universe. Leaving Twilight and the others having to explain to Applejack the convoluted circumstances that lead to Twilight Sparkle of that universe being a changeling and being stuck in the body of a fictional sex symbol.

The wha-if machine's screen flickered.

Changeling Twilight Sparkle grunted in frustration at the annoying suitors who kept coming to her place of business now that she was stuck as 'Heart Breaker' until she found a way to undo this spell.

"Arrgh! Now I have stallions doing things like getting themselves lost just so I can come and rescue them. This is worse than when I had ponies buddying up to me because I was Celestia's student! You're so lucky you don't have to deal with this, Rarity. All the gifts and letters and invitations to expensive romantic getaways..."

"Yes, dear," Rarity said, her eye twitching as she turned away before she could scream. "I'm so VERY lucky nopony notices me any more." Rarity went off to drown her sorrows in ice cream.

Twilight noticed that there was only one stallion left who hadn't ran away in fear. An orange pegasus stallion with a blue mane and tail.

The stallion walked over to where Twilight was, a little afraid but still full of determination. "Hum... Miss Twilight, is your magic for hire business still open?"

Twilight still remained in her menacing Changeling Queen form. She raised an eyebrow at this, "Yes, yes it is. Do you need something?"

The stallion approached until he was face to face with Twilight, "Please, can you help my little brother!?"

Twilight's eyes opened wide, "Huh?"

"My brother. He's really sick, and I've taken him to the hospital already but the doctors there can't figure out what's wrong with him, and I'm really desperate now. Please, Miss Twilight, you're my only hope!"

Twilight shook off her surprise and then dispelled the illusion spell since it was really doing nothing right now for her but waste mana. This in turn made her again take her true-fake form (for the moment) of the beautiful Heartbreaker. "Where is your brother now?" she asked.

"In his room, resting." replied the stallion.

"Okay, then take me to him... what's your name?" asked Twilight.

"Flash Sentry." replied the orange pegasus.

"Take me to him, Flash."

5 minutes later the two entered one of the many houses in Ponyville, one that really didn't stand out from any other.

"Wait here in the main room, I'll go get First Base." said Flash.

"First Base?" asked Twilight.

"That's my brother's name." explained Flash.

Twilight watched as Flash left the room, and was back a couple of seconds later with a small pillow. On the small pillow, however, was something out of the ordinary. A tiny pony, not larger than a mouse.

Flash placed the pillow on a table and signaled, worriedly, for Twilight to come and take a look.

"Okay... here he is. Can you help him?"

Twilight looked carefully at the pony. His body structure and proportions made it clear that he was a colt, had he been regular sized then he wouldn't be bigger than Applebloom, Scootaloo, or Sweetie Belle. He had an orange coat and mane and tail, but darker than his older brother's. He was an Earth Pony and had a cutie mark already, a baseball and a bat.

"What happened here? Did somepony cast a spell on him?" asked Twilight.

"Not that we know of... I was hoping you can help us figure it out." replied Flash.

"When did this happen?" asked Twilight.

"I woke up today and went to check on him, and he was like this on his bed. Still asleep, he was really scared and confused when he woke up." replied Flash.

First Base frowned, "I wasn't scared. I didn't cry at all!"

Twilight looked at First Base and smiled, "Oh, I'm sure you are one brave colt." trying to look the least intimidating as possible considering how big she was in relation to the little colt. "Okay, First Base, why don't you tell me what you did yesterday before you came home."

"Okay. After school some of the colts and fillies from school gathered to play baseball, but all the best spots were taken. So we found this very big clearing next to the Everfree Forest." explained First Base.

"The Everfree Forest!" exclaimed Flash, "How many times have I told you to stay away from that place! It's dangerous!"

"We weren't going to go IN the forest!" defended First Base.

"Please, please, this isn't helping." interrupted Twilight, "Please, continue."

"Okay... so, we were playing for a while and then I hit the ball really hard when it was my turn at the bat. And the ball flew into the everfree forest. All the colts and filies were bummed out about it because we didn't have another one to play with, until one of them said that I should go find it because I was the one that lost it by hitting it."

"First Base..." started Flash.

"I wasn't going to go in the forest! I told them that it was dangerous... but then they started calling me a chicken... until I finally went in there."

"Brother, I know it sucks to be called a coward. But doing something stupidly dangerous does not prove you are brave." said Flash.

"I agree with your brother here." said Twilight, "But it is something you'll have to talk about later. Right now I really need for you to finish your story First Base."

First Base nodded, "So I carefully walked in the forest, and I saw the ball right away. It was lying in the middle of a big field of blue flowers. So I ran, picked it up and ran out again and we continued playing."

"Wait, you said a field of blue flowers?" asked Twilight.

"Uhu." nodded First Base.

"Poison Joke." said Twilight, knowing what it was right then and there. "Now, I don't have the cure for it, but I know someone who does. I'll be right back. And while I'm gone I need for you to prepare a hot bath." she said to Flash Sentry.

With that Twilight teleported away to Zecora's place.

About 10 minutes later she teleported back, holding a small paper package with her magic. She could hear running water in one of the house's rooms.

"Flash? First Base?" asked Twilight.

The head of Flash peeped out from one of the rooms in the house, the bathroom. "Twilight, you're back. The hot bath you asked for is ready."

"Great. Is First Base there with you?" asked Twilight.


"Okay then, let's do this." Twilight walked inside and saw a medium sized bathtub filled with hot water, warm enough to be comfortable to bathe in, not too hot so it wouldn't be uncomfortable. She opened the small package and poured its contents into the bath, some strange looking powder.

"This is Poision Joke antidote. All First Base needs to do is get into the water."

"Oh, okay. You heard that First Ba..."

"CANNONBALL!!" Before anyone noticed, First Base ran from the bathroom counter he was standing on towards the bath, and jumped into the bath.
A second later he emerged, wet and laughing, and normal sized.

"It worked!" Flash Sentry hugged his brother happily, "Oh, thank you so much, Twilight."

Twilight smiled, "My pleasure. Now First Base, just stay in there and soak in the water for a couple of minutes and the effects of the Poison Joke will be completelt gone from your system."

"Okay, thank you!" said happily First Base, soaking in the tub.

Twilight walked out and was making her way towards the door when she was stopped by Flash Sentry calling back to her. "Twilight, wait!"


"How much do I owe you, for the help?" asked Flash.

"Oh, please, don't worry about it." replied Twilight.

"HEY!" Twilight in the studio said. "How come all I heard was static when that cute, I mean that stallion was saying his name?" Twilight in the studio recognized him as the stallion who had helped her for a short time during the final battle of the changeling invasion.

"You learning his name is a certainty. Not a what-if." The what-if machine explained.

"Well," Twilight sighed, "That's a plus I guess."

The What If Machine looked to Applejack. "I am sorry you find this form unpleasant but I wish you would not call me a 'contraption'. I am a sapient entity and self aware. I find being called a 'contraption' offensive."

Applejack pinned her ears. She remembered that universe were they were all robots. "...Ah guess yah bein' offended by that is fair...Yeah, Ah'm sorry fer that...that body is still freaky though, sorry."

"I will attempt to refine this form to make it less creepy," the Machine replied.

"...Can we see some more of that robot us universe? Yah seemed tah like that one."

"I do enjoy that universe. It helped me confirm that my existence goes beyond simply being a machine. Fluttershy, you and Fluttercruel may enjoy this universe."

Fluttershy's ears perked.



"Okay, girls, um... I think it's time you all really met her so, um.... here's Jittercruel," Flutter-Fi explained.

Their casing changed color to a darker shade and the Cutiemark changed like pixels into their new form. Complete with a transforming sound effect. Fangs slid out as well.

"Hi..." the transformed mechanical pony said, having been born from Dis-Cord's virus and her mother's core programming. She was probably a tad bit more shy than intended.


Fluttercruel smiled. "Wow, I look pretty badflank as a robot!...Good to know I'm not a psychopath in every other universe. "I wonder what it's like to be a robot..."

"Showing daily life."


"Um…Jittercruel are you sure about this?" Flutter-Fi asked in their processor.

"Oh come on mom! It's just a chainsaw upgrade! Applejack has one!"

"Yes, but that's for cutting damaged limbs to keep her trees all nice and healthy…" Naturally, trees weren't the same as in organic universes, since everything was mechanical. They were more living metal like everything else, and produced energy in a thin cybernetic membrane that still looked like apples.

"Oh come on, what could go wron-"


"...I'll fix the wall..."


"THAT ROCKS!" Futtercruel cheered. "THAT'S AWFUL!" Fluttershy countered pointed.

"I wonder if we all transcended flesh in some point in the past to become living machines.' Twilight Sparkle wondered, remember a dream she had had of all the accomplishments, good and evil, of ponies if they hadn't been blasted back to the middle ages by the failed Wish Spell.

"Dem machines are still creepy!" AJ said.

"THey could use some more polish perhaps." Rarity added.

"Meh. My life is the same in every universe. In a way that's actually pretty comforting," Coffee Swirl said. "Oh and Fluttercruel? I thought your chainsaw upgrades were freaky, but very you, and very bad flank, just don't go pointing those at ponies if you ever have those here."

"Don't worry Swirl, I'm out of that phase in my life." Fluttercruel fluttered up and nuzzled him.

"Okay," Twilight said, looking down at the slumbering Pinkie Pie. Behind her Raimbow Dash returned alone from her flight and landed inside the room. "How do we wake her up?"

"Pff, that's easy," she said as she pushed past Twilight and the rest. "Hadda see Gilda off, but she'll be back sometime. And as for Pinkie?" She leaned down and set her mouth by Pinkie's hairy ear and said, "Hey, Pinkie, there's a party to throw and nopony to do it!"

Pinkie Pie, still, asleep, began to vibrate so hard that she partly faded from view, as though she were passing between dimensions.

Dash stood beside her as Twi and the others began backing away, ears down in their fear. Maud, as usual, stood close by, imperturbable.

"Eeep! Not to tell you what to do, but Rainbow Dash, are you sure that was a good idea?" Fluttershy said from behind an overturned bench for a barrier. Rarity and Applejack knelt beside her, both of them wearing helmets -- Applejack's a dull green, Rarity's painted in black and gold and with a phoenix feather plume. The What-If Machine stayed down behind them. Being a machine, it had a well-made sense of self-preservation.

"She's right, dear," Rarity said as the vibrations set the windows to rattling. "Tempting fate is never a good idea!"

"Aw, what's the worst that could happen?" Dash yelled back right before a bolt of lightning from a pink cloud gathering around Pinkie zapped her appearance into a clown-pony. Dash looked down and yelled, "Oh, buck! Not again!"

"Twi, what're ya doing?" Applejack yelled at their purple friend. She stood in the middle of it all, horn alight and frantically writing down notes.

"This time I'll get some worthwhile data out of all this!" Twilight yelled back. She dodged small chinks of ceiling falling as the shaking of the still-unconscious Pinkie sent cracks through the walls. One large piece almost flattened her. She abandoned her efforts and dove for cover. "Then again, it helps to be alive to share the information!"

"Huh," Maud said as she looked at it. Another large piece almost hit her; she idly knocked it aside. "Portland Cement They usually make it to withstand greater stress than this."

Coffee Swirl bolting, abandoning his post. "Buck this!"

"He's left me!" Fluttercruel said, none of her normal biting sarcasm or aggression present. She actually sounded a bit, hurt.

And then there came something like an explosion of a pink cloud...

Five ponies and Maud thought they saw a hairless overweight Diamond Dog writing at a desk while someone called, "Can't you ever keep it short?"...

A pink alicorn seemed to appear, her cutie mark indescriable but filling every heart that saw it with the desire to laugh their joy out loud. She gave them all a grin and wink (and restored Dash to normal) and vanished...

And they all heard Pinkie say in her bubbliest voice ever:

"Did somepony say a PARTY?"

A pink blur seemed to be everywhere in the room at once, repairing the damage, setting up tables, putting up a Pin The Tail On The Pony game, mixing and cooking and carelessly tossing snacks (including Maud's favorite rock candy) at a table that all somehow landed in the exact right places, even the punch, and hanging balloons and streamers and a banner that read  WELCOME TO PONYVILLE MAUD-- all in far less time than it takes to say.

It helped Goth and Ghost Pinkie had done much the same while waiting for Pinkie to rest.

The stunned ponies, calm Maud, and curious Machine gathered around as the blur turned back into Pinkie Pie and said:

"Welcome to Ponyville, big sis! Now who's ready for a party -- finally?"
Applejack ducked into the prop room and returned with a fiddle.  "How's about we get this party started?"  She played a simple melody, five notes and five notes more, then began a slow waltz to the tune, adding more flourishes as she went along.

Rarity smiled.  "We used to practice in finishing school, just like this."  She gave an elegant bow.  "Would you care to dance, Miss Fluttershy?"

Fluttershy spread her wings, blushing.  "Oh!  I suppose I could, but I don't know..."  "Don't look at me!  I'm not doing some sissy dance like that."  "Young lady... on second thought, I'd be delighted to dance with you, Miss Belle."  She took Rarity's hoof and bowed back, and then they stepped to the beat, with Fluttershy sweeping her wings like the ball gown neither of them had.

"What do you think, Maud?" asked Twilight.  "Do you dance?"

"That isn't the kind of music I like to dance to," deadpanned Maud.

"You heard the mare," said Rainbow Dash.  "Kick it up a notch!"

Applejack grinned and jumped straight into the first thing that came to mind, the "Apples to the Core" number they played at family reunions.  Rarity switched to square dancing without missing a step, and Fluttershy went "Eeep!" trying to keep up.

Rainbow Dash giggled.  "Careful, or Twilight might start dancing again."

Twilight stopped tapping her hoof to the beat and sighed.

Rainbow blinked.  "Er, which would be fine!  Because this is about having a good time, not impressing anypony!"

Twilight cheered right up.  "Thanks, I think."

"That still isn't it," said Maud, expressionlessly.  "The kind of music that I like the best is..."

"Wait for it..." said Rainbow Dash.

"Rock music."

Pinkie Pie played an enthusiastic rim shot.  On an actual drum set that didn't go away when she finished the gag.  She giggled and snatched Applejack's fiddle too, replacing it with an electric bass guitar.

"What the heck kind of fiddle is this?"  AJ poked at it with a hoof, and got a discordant blast of sound that nearly made her drop the guitar.  "How do Ah play it with no bow?"

"You'll get the hang of it," said Pinkie.

"Ah still don't see how..."

Pinkie Pie twirled the drumsticks with her hooves somehow.  "A one, two, THREE, FOUR!!"

While the party get started, the What If Machine gave this some thought. "Something is missing. Engage What If protocol 'What if this party was not missing something?"

The what if ran though it and it nodded.

It used the hole in the fourth wall and reached to a point where it's new guests wouldn't be too busy, and transported them there.

Octavia and Photo Finish blinked, looking around themselves in confusion. "What...exactly is going on here?"
"Hi girls!"

"Pinkie Pie, should have known." Octavia sighed.

"Everything that does the explaining," Photo Finish said.

"Photo Finish! And I'm not even dressed!" Rarity freaked and quickly ran behind a curtain and came out in her gala dress. "There."

"Don't ever do that again." Twilight Sparkle warned the machine. "This place's spacial fabric is fragile enough!"

"Fine. Cross my process, hope to fly, stick a cupcake on my screen."

"OH MY! Not again!" Fluttershy hide behind the couch seeing Photo Finish. Then Fluttercruel took control. "Oh yes! If first you don't succeed! No we aren't! Yes we are!" Fluttershy and Fluttercruel began to wrestle with control of the body or approaching to renew their contract with Photo Finish, or stay hidden from her.

"It's a party for our sister!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed.

"But we're all here!" Octvaia said.  

"Hello Limestone Pie, hello Marble Pie." Maud Pie said.

" . . . I haven't gone by that name in years . . ." Octavia whispered.

Photo Finish looked around to make sure none had caught her birth name.

"Who are you?" Octavia asked.

"Hey! That's no way to act towards our big sister!" Pinkie Pie said.

"Big . . ." Octavia felt fizzy, so did Photo Finish as Maud Pie's existence began to catch up to them. Applejack recognized what was going on. So would have Shining Armor, though he had never been an outisde observer.
Applejack knew what was going on far too well, in fact.  She saw Octavia and Photo Finish dismissing Maud Pie as a complete stranger.  She saw Octavia and Photo Finish greeting Maud, the sister they hadn't seen in ages.  AJ dropped Pinkie's electric fiddle contraption and backed away, her head pounding.  Truth itself was being rewritten as she watched.

Photo Finish rubbed her eyes.  "Who? .... Maud?  Do I know a Maud?"  She shook herself.  "But of course, how silly of me!  This is extraordinary...  How long has it been since we four stood together?"

"I'm sorry Maud it's . . . it's been a while and . . . I've been . . . well, maybe just trying to fit in at Canterlot." Octavia said.

'IN MOST UNIVERSES WE AREN'T EVEN SISTERS, AND YOU'RE SEPARATE BEINGS FROM PINKIE PIE'S SISTERS.' Not-Maud thought. Then mostly-Maud thought, ' . . . still . . . in this one . . .  I'm . . . happy to have you with me.'

She'd known that Maud Pie was weird, but she'd assumed it was just a Pinkie Pie kind of weird, not this!  "First Twilight and her big brother, then Rarity and her big sister," she muttered to herself.  "Who else is a fake, and Ah didn't even know?  Ah can't take this... The lies, they've got to stop, they've all got to..."

Applejack trailed off.  Now, she almost missed being the Opaque Wolf.  Just like Pandora had said, wolves didn't go mad, but AJ didn't have that protection anymore.  "Ah... Ah don't need Nightmare Mirror.  Ah've got something better.  Snow Bound, I need help.  There's another insertion here."

Immediately, the Blank Wolf appeared by her side, startling her.  "What?" he growled.  "Did I not say that I would come at once?  Now, where is it?"

"There!" AJ whispered, pointing a hoof at Maud.

The Blank Wolf looked.  Large golden eyes blinked slowly.  "You noticed her.  I had hoped you would not."

Applejack gawked.  "Hold on a sec.  You knew this whole time, she wasn't really..."

A large paw covered her mouth before she could finish.  "Applejack, do you really believe that I could be five paces from an insertion and not know?  She has inserted herself into your world, it is true, for reasons I cannot comprehend, but she is much more than that."

"Well, what is she, then?" asked Applejack.  "You can stop her, ri..."

This time, the Wolf yanked them in between moments before she could finish.  "No!" he snarled.  "There is no 'stopping her.'  I am forbidden to hunt the avatar of a goddess, and even you could not have hunted *this* avatar.  Absolutely not!  Paws off!"

"So, playing along is ALL we can do?" stammered Applejack.  "Can you at least tell me that she's not evil, or up to no good?"

"Maud Pie is not evil," said the Wolf carefully.  "As for her intentions, if I had to guess, I might say that she probably considers you and friends to have done her a service by defeating Discord, so she *probably* means well..."

Applejack glared at him.  "Ya could have told me that up front, ya know."

The Blank Wolf smirked.  "Well, perhaps you'll think now, before you go annoying yet another god.  Now, smile."  He showed her a grin full of large, sharp fangs.  "Try not to contradict her, and do enjoy your party."  He sent her back to the studio alone.

"Oh! Pinkie Pie!!! You have Photo Finish, AND a professional Canterlot musician as sisters and you never spoke of it before?!" Rarity gasped.

"Whoa." RD stared.

"And I'm pushed to the side lines in my own introduction chapter again," Maud said evenly, and as low as possible so no one heard her, not wanting to be rude.

AJ wondered. 'Are Pinkie's OTHER sisters on the up and up?'

'Yes . . . there's simply a difference between relations of your world and the heart world. Nothing truly strange.' She heard the wolf's voice in her head for a sec before it vanished again.
The What If Machine's screen turned blue and had a frowny face. "Miss Rarity, I appreciate your emotions. But I did not summon these two here for that reason. I summoned them here because this is Miss Maud Pie's party and I believed it would make her happy. Please allow their arrival to be a joyous one for her rather than overshadowing her...if you don't mind."

It looked to Fluttershy. "Did I do the 'politely ask for something' protocol correctly?"

Fluttershy nodded with a smile. "Yes, very good."

Rarity blinked. "Oh dear, I'm sorry Maud, I must have forgotten myself..."

"No problem..." Maud replied in her own fashion.

"Though to be honest I'm certainly surprised. You four seem nothing alike."

"I think I'm the only 'traditional' rock farmer out of us..." Maud admitted.

"Mother and father were glad she decided to stay home with them," Octavia admitted. "But it simply wasn't our thing, you know?"
"Okie doki!" said Pinkie brightly.  "If that's all out of the way, then Maud is still waiting for her rock music!  I'm on drums, Applejack's got the bass..."

AJ picked the electric bass guitar up again, like it was a snake that might bite her.  "Pinkie, this didn't work so well last time."

Pinkie dashed to the prop room and back in a colorful blur.  "That's because we didn't have the whole group, silly.  This is for you, Fluttershy."

Fluttershy looked at the tambourine in her hooves and shook it once.  "I... guess I could play this."

"Guitar for Rainbow Dash, keytar for Rarity..."

Rarity blinked.  "Do you have any idea how to play..."

"Kinda, maybe?" Rainbow Dash shrugged.

"What else..." said Pinkie, tapping a hoof against her chin.  "Oh, right!  These are for Twilight."  Pinkie put a pair of fluffy prop wings on Twilight Sparkle that made her look like a little Princess Luna.  Then she pushed a heavy amp/mixer console into the room, making a show of grunting and straining to move it.  "Octavia, you're Vinyl Scratch."

"I beg your pardon?"

"And Photo Finish can be Sunset Shimmer!"

"Sunset who?" asked Twilight.

Maud sighed.  "Pinkie..."  Somewhere, a wolf growled.

Pinkie blushed.  "Forget I said that!"  She played a rising roll on the cymbals.  "Okay, hit it!"

"Hit what?" said AJ, and then her hooves started moving by themselves, laying down a fast beat.  Fluttershy shook her tambourine, Rainbow Dash and Rarity played like they were born to do it, and Pinkie drummed like a mad mare.  "Oh, so that's how this thing plays!" said AJ, grinning and letting the heart song work its magic.

"Amazing!" cried Twilight, swaying to the beat next to Photo Finish.  "A heart song with instruments that are physically present!  But what do we sing?"

The What-If Machine whirred and acted like a teleprompter, scrolling song lyrics up its screen.

Once upon a time
You came into my world and made the stars align
Now I see the signs
You pick me up when I get down so I can shine

The scrolling text fuzzed and glitched, and the song they were singing abruptly changed keys.

We used to fight with each other
That was before we discovered
That when your friendship is real
Yeah, you just say what ya feel

"Hey, are these the right lyrics?" asked Pinkie.

The What-If Machine flashed an embarrassed emoticon with a sweat drop.  "Of course they are... somewhere..."

We don't know what's gonna happen
We just know it's gonna feel right
All of our friends are here
And it's time to ignite the lights!

Rainbow light surged around the performers, putting rainbow accents in their tails and manes, and dressing them in colorful rock star outfits themed after their cutie marks.  The light swirled around Maud without touching her, and enveloped the studio, repairing the gaping holes in the wall.

Rarity gasped, looking from pony to pony with eyes sparkling, taking in every detail of the magical outfits.  "Oh, I know what I'll be doing after the party!"

Rainbow Dash whooped, pumping a hoof in the air.  "Girls, we should totally start a band, for real!"  She spread her wings and hovered off the floor, posing above the group with Fluttershy... and Twilight, who was enjoying herself herself too much to question how she could float with prop wings.

The screen glitched again.  "Error, dimension not found.  Error..."

When we shine like rainbows
We're awesome as we wanna be!

Maud never cracked a smile, but she swayed to the music, tapping a hoof to the beat.  "All of this, for me?  I'm so happy."
The pony shaped what-if machine began to shake and rattle.

"Are you okay?" Flutterhy asked.

"This unit . . . does-does believe . . . this b-body is-is not . . . well designed . . . or-or . . . that-that well put together . . .  I am a what-if machine, not an engineer or a robotics expert." Then the pony body of the what-if machine fell apart back into the scrap metal it had been half-hazardly put together from various spare parts.

Finally the what-if machine's original body, the wooden 50s TV set with rabbit ears antenna remains. The machine's pieces clattered around it. A little drop of truth that powered the what-if machine's ability to view into possibilities, flew through the air . . . and landed on Twilight Sparkle.

Twilight happened to be looking at a shinning serving plate at that moment. Before truth evaporated, she thought, 'All this fun, and to think I'd once consider socializing with this many ponies my inner worst nightmare.'

Twilight's view was of an infinitely tall and deep purple chamber with no ceiling or floor, just fading into the darkness above and blow.

A purple pillar was at the center, with the same semi-square pattern on it as the walls and made of the same material with no sharp angles, like melted wax. Chains randomly connected the walls the edges of the pillar's top.

Standing in the center, smiling without a trace of malice, was an Alicorn. Her armor was white, and her coat was dark purple, and her mane reminded Twilight of purple flames, and her eyes were like those of a dragon. Her cutie mark . . . was an inversion of Twilight's own.

"Welcome to my soul, oh, sorry our soul, oops, my mistake, I was right the first time. Silly me, since when do I get facts wrong? This is my soul, you're just little aspects of my psyche. How silly of me!!" Her voice, it was so familiar that it Twilight felt her blood run cold.

Twilight became all too aware that of her body was imbedded in the wall. Only of most her her head, some of her belly, and her forelegs hung uselessly out of the wall. She couldn't move. She couldn't speak. All she could do was watch. She then became aware of whimpering . . .. above her, below her, to her sides, all around her . . . countless unicorns, all looking exactly like Twilight, letting out barely audible whispers.  

They were in neatly organized circular rows, each one evenly in one of the square indentations. They went on forever.

"'Rain." One of the Twilights croaked out.

Then Twilight was the Alicorn, was the Nightmare, she was at the center, with the 320,979 Twilight Sparkles that currently made her up, and more along the way. All adding their tiny little help to the greater good. It was so nice of them to embrace becoming something greater, to become whole, to stop being caterpillars and become a butterfly.

It was her responsibility to punish Discord, her responsibility to make sure all the versions of herself reached Alicornhood, it was her responsibility to wipe away the incompetent, lazy, petty, and selfish concepts that made up the universe, and create the golden world with her friends. Starlight, Bright Eyes, and all those pony scientists just weren't smart enough to accomplish their dream. But she was smart enough. She'd make Princess Celestia very very proud. After all, it was a student's responsibility to surpass her teacher after all.

And everypony would be happy. Except Discord. But who cared about the selfish scum that needed to be gotten rid of for the good of everypony else?

Twilight Sparkle gasped as Pinkie Pie tapped her ont he shoulder. "You okay Twilight?"

"I . . . I . . . it's nothing, it's nothing." Twilight shivered, her eyes were misty. She was surprised when Applejack hugged her before Pinkie Pie joined her.

"It's okay Twilight, it's okay, everythin' turns out fer the best, it's okay."

The three nuzzled.

"It's alright." Not-Quite-Maud Pie said, "She won't ever exist again. You never have to be afraid of her. She can't hurt anypony else ever again."

The What If Machine showed a sad emoticon. "I just wished to dance..."

Octavia looked to Maud. "What is that thing?"

"A machine of Pinkie Pie's that became self aware..." Maud explained, in her normal deadpan. "Lightning hit it."

"...How does..."

"It said it was science..."

Applejack looked at the Truth and wiped it up, just in case. She then looked at the What If Machine, sensing more inside it. 'So that's how it does that...Ah wonder if havin' that inside it is what let it come tah life...'

The What If Machine got it's tendrils back and was still capable of moving.

Twilight looked to it. "...Is what Maud said true? That...that Nightmare..."

"...Machine's probability sensors confirm: Maud's presumption is correct."

"...How did you?"

"My power source is a part of me, anything one sees through it I is strange...and in my home reality lead to an awkward series of events...involving a drunken robot...I don't wish to speak of it."

"...Don't blame you...How does a robot get drunk?"

"In my world, robots get drunk if they don't they drink all the is very very strange...I am from an adult cartoon dimension...which reminds me..."

The What If Machine wrote a message on a piece of paper, tied it to a brick, and threw it through a dimensional portal, nailing a bald human scientist in the noggin before the portal closed.


"I sent my creator a well thought out letter detailing why I'm never returning there and he was a bad parent...the brick was because my home reality's rules permit such things."

On the other side of the closed portal, the bald 160+ old scientist said, "Oh well. Looks it's just you and me What-If Machine 2.0."

Applejack psychically contacted Snowbound, as an instinct, it worried her a little that it didn't worry her that she realized she could do so. 'Uh...why exactly is this thing in our universe without setting you off?'

'Because...well, the potential Three of Cups Alicorn got permission to 'import him' so Pinkie could us him and his soul was born in OUR universe.'

'Three of Cups?'

'The Love Cats worship her.'

'Oh...oh!' Applejack replied, looking at Pinkie Pie with a blink.

The What If Machine looked back to Maud. "This is not my party, let us return to celebrating Miss Maud...but can I have an 'you're alive party' at another date?"

Pinkie giggled. "Sure! Come on sisters! Let's party some more!"
Maud Pie was putting a blindfold on Pinkie, with Fluttershy and Rarity waiting for their turns, over by the Pin the Tail on the Pony board. Photo Finish smiled. "Eet's not the kind of entertainment I usually host, but just for today..."

Applejack poked at the electric bass and played the first bar of Apples to the Core, plucking the notes carefully. Octavia borrowed the lead guitar from Dash and played an answering phrase, grinning in challenge. Applejack grinned right back. "Ah'm gonna enjoy this."

Twilight lingered next to the What-If Machine. The rainbow clothes had disappeared with the music, but she was still wearing the prop wings. "Funny how I saw that horrible nightmare when I was still dressed as the Princess of Rock and Roll." She blinked. "I know what might cheer me up! What-If Machine, please show me Princess Twilight Sparkle!"

The Machine whirred. "Warning: The requested situation may not be what you expect." The screen lit up with a bright sunny day in Ponyville, and zoomed in on a restaurant.

Twilight squinted at the screen. "Oh, there I am. What the..."

Rainbow Dash wandered over. "So you're a princess in that world."

"Wings and everything," said Twilight, frowning.

RD smirked. "Strolling around town as naked as anypony else? Eating lunch at the Hay Burger."

"It's showing me that even as a princess, I haven't lost touch with my friends," said Twilight, a bit defensively. "Or with ordinary ponies. Oh, see there? I'm having lunch with the Crusaders!"

Rainbow Dash snerked. "More like stuffing your face. Er... sorry, Twilight. I shouldn't have laughed."

"It could be worse, I suppose. I could be stuffing my face with cake. Ugh, just... help me get these wings off. Suddenly being an alicorn doesn't seem like all it's cracked up to be." Twilight turned, and unexpectedly found herself face to face with Maud.

Maud simply said, "Being an alicorn doesn't mean the same thing there. But that Twilight saved her Equestria. She was the only princess who could. Her and her friends."

Twilight stared, caught by Maud's gaze. "How do you know this?"

Maud looked away, and the spell was broken. "Excuse me. It's my turn to wear the blindfold."

Applejack threw up her hooves. "All right, all right! Big surprise, yer better than me by a mile. But if it was fiddles..."

Octavia beamed. "I'm even better with the fiddle. Shall I go fetch a pair of them?"

"Sure thing!" Left to herself for a moment, AJ glared at the machine. "Didn't ya have anything more encouraging to show Twilight?"

The Machine whirred again. "Displaying a future that may yet come to pass is prohibited. Displaying a current reality of your world is also prohibited."

"Huh? There's ain't any 'Princess Twilight Sparkle' here now... Is there?"

"Do not concern yourself with that, Applejack. All will be well."

AJ frowned... but Octavia was approaching with the fiddles. "If you say so..."

The what-if machine heard a voice.

"Ever show anything from the heart world again, and I will eat your brain."


The Machine started to fizzle and pop.

Pinkie trotted over to it. "Funny, I thought the fireworks weren't supposed to start until later...." She hoofed the top of the machine. "Stupid thing. Must be bust--"

The Machine displayed its frowny-face icon.  "Didn't we just talk... about ponies hitting the machine and calling it stupid all the time?"  The display glitched badly and lit up with a new scene.

On the grand balcony, darkness swirled and coalesced into the terrifying figure of Nightmare Moon!  "Oh, my beloved subjects.  It's been so long since I've seen your precious, little sun-loving...  what."

The ponies in the crowd below were orange purple-maned pegasus ponies.  Every single one of them.

"What did you do with our Princess?" demanded the one with the rainbow stripe in her purple mane.

She tried to fly straight at the Nightmare, but the one wearing a Stetson grabbed her tail, holding her back.  "Whoa there, Scootaloo Dash!"

Nightmare Moon just stared.  "What?  Why....  how?"

"Ooh, is this a guessing game?" cried the orange pegasus with the extra-poofy purple mane.

"This ain't the time for that, Scootaloo Pie.  We gotta find out what she's done with Princess Flora!"

The Nightmare facehoofed.  "What is going on here?"

"I'm... kind of wondering that myself," said an embarrassed Scootaloo Sparkle.  She had extra purple and pink stripes in her already purple mane.  "I read the legends, but... you're not who I was expecting, exactly."

"I think I came down to the wrong place," muttered Nightmare Moon.

Darkness gathered a second time, with a showy whirlwind of black feathers, and a second Nightmare appeared on the balcony...  orange and purple-maned of course, with regal barding and a silver crown that strangely resembled a crash-helmet.  "I'll say you have!  Away with you!  Scootalestria will be mine alone!"

Scootaloo Sparkle perked up.  "Okay, THAT'S Nightmare Maleficent!  Whew... my faith in scholarly research is restored!"

Nightmare Moon sighed.  "I'll just pop back up to the Moon and try this again..."
When the Pin the Tail on the Pony game wound down, Pinkie brought out a "Famicolt" game console and plugged it into the What-If Machine.  Now Maud and Twilight were madly working their game controllers, focused on the 8-bit sprites of Cadence and Shining Armor that were bouncing and blasting their way through "Heart Stealers from Dimension Z: A Royal Canterlot Adventure."

The What-If Machine whirred.  "When did I acquire a video-in port?"

"I still don't see why I had to play as my brother," mused Twilight, chewing on her lip as she fired off another round of bouncing shield bubbles.

"Well, Maud IS the party girl," said Rarity.  "She had first pick."

The game announcer exclaimed something in Neighponese, subtitled as {Power Up!  Honesty!}.  The action briefly switched to full-screen artwork of Cadence saying {These eyes can see through all of your tricks!}, and the Cadence sprite started mowing down monsters with orange eye-lasers.

"I have to admit," said Rainbow Dash, watching "Shining Armor" bounce up a stack of crates with pixel-perfect accuracy, "I didn't think an egghead like you would be into video games like this, but you're pretty good!"

"Well, it's not a very sophisticated program," said Twilight brightly, never taking her eyes off the screen.  "Once you've seen all of the possible enemy moves..."  {Power Up!  Loyalty!}  This time, Shiny's face filled the screen.  {I swear by all the gods, I'll never leave you behind!}   Red chains started whipping monsters out of his way.

"So when did you get so good at this, sis?" asked Pinkie.

"I know how this one ends," droned Maud.  "It's just a matter of getting there."

"This is actually a lot of fun," said Twilight.  "I just wish the subtitles were more accurate."

Fluttershy blinked.  "Twilight, you know Neighponese?"  "I get it.  She cast a translation spell, right?"

Twilight blushed.  "No, I do know Neighponese.  It's a long story."

Pinkie grinned with a squeak.  {Don't worry, Twilight!  Nopony knows about all those letters you wrote complaining about the plot inconsistencies in your favorite manega back in magic college!}

{Unforgivable!} cried Twilight, leaping up with metaphoric flames exploding behind her.  {Impossible!  How could you know of that?}

Pinkie winked.  {That's a secret, teehee!}

Twilight glared at Pinkie in a huff, until she realized that Shiny had gotten clobbered by the monsters while she was distracted.  {You can't lose now, Shiny!  Get up and fight!}  {Continue?}  "Here, Dash, why don't you take a turn?"

"Shiny, dear, what's that?" Cadence looked at the heavy envelope in her husband's telekinetic grip.

"The first payment from that game company in Neighpon." Shining Armor opened the envelope, turning it upside down, and -- two bits fell out, as well as a plugged nickel.

Cadence and Shining Armor both looked at them in some confusion.

"Okay, I know that game is doing great," Cadence said, lashing her tail in annoyance, "even some of the palace staff are playing it. Where the hay is the money going?"

And thousands of miles away, two unicorns in an office, both with white-striped red manes, gloated over a pile of bits.

"See, Flim? I TOLD you we should have gone into game marketing years ago! This is more bits than we ever got cheating yokels like in Ponyville!"

"That was a really long and power telescopic lens . . ." Pinkie Pie said back in the studio, making sure that Applejack and Twilight didn't see that and upset the applecart.

Sneaking around was rather easy, when you were already a background pony.

'Maud' was busy scoring point after point while Rainbow Dash bitterly grumbled about 'Hax'. Twilight and Pinkie were busy having conversations in neighponese and generally parodying the various anime tropes in the process. Rarity was ever being the socialite, even if it was just among a group of her friends, and Applejack was humoring her. The Flutters were alternating between Shy talking with Rarity and Applejack and Cruel calling next turn on the game. Octavia had taken to practicing her music (one didn't get to be a great musician by being idle after all), and Photo Finish was just the type of pony who wouldn't notice him, he wasn't important enough to catch her eye.

As such, it was almost pathetically easy for Coffee Swirl to sneak back into the studio.

After that, however, he quickly shuffled off to one of the various side rooms. He had (At the berating of the ghosts in his sword) managed to work up the courage to come back; but working up the courage to apologize to Fluttercruel was another matter entirely.

"Why couldn't I just fight another mad god?" he grumbled. "I'm better at that."

'Thou art behaving in a manner unbecoming a knight, Sir Swirl.'

"Knights haven't exist in Equestria for over a thousand years, Squire. And no, Shining Armor does NOT count. Just... give me a bit, okay? I don't know how to do this sort of thing."

"Silly pony, don't you know there are no background ponies in this verse?"

Pinkie Pie giggled as she changed the transmission from the studio's security cameras that had caught Coffee Swirl's every move, to another telescopic lens shot of Canterlot.

Luna was chatting, "And that is why sister, we believe it is vital that we restore the position of Knight in Equestria. Besides, Dame Cheerilee was already Knighted by Princess Gaia so it might be best in case she is needed when Gaia is unsealed."

Back in the studio, after winning that level, Maud set her controller down. "Pinkie, can you come over here?"

The pink party pony bounced over. "Yeah sis?"

Maud looked to the What If Machine. "Can you still tune things so only certain ponies can see it?"

"Yes. Or simply seal the area if requested for privacy's sake," the Machine replied.


Maud trotted over and whispered something to the What If Machine.

"Understood. The following vision will only be visible to those aware of a universe that no longer is, it will be censored for the sack of the sanity of all else involved..."

'You'd better not-' the Blank Wolf warned.

'The Empress of Not requested it.'

'...Good point. Go ahead...'

"Aww, but what about the game?" Rainbow asked.

"Downloading save file to central system...You may now play it on the main screen."

"Alright, continue!"

"Beginning situation."

"Minty!" called Pinkie Pie, the pink pony trotting over to her green friend.

"Yeah Pinkie?!" the green mare asked, trotting over.

"Something extra special!"

"Really? Is it more special than the time we all became Princesses?!"

"Well for me it is! My big sister's coming to Ponyville to visit!"

"Wait...I...I don't remember..." Pinkie Pie said in reality, blinking in confusion.

"...If the spell worked right, then it wouldn't have forgotten to give you a complete, concrete background," a mix of Maud Pie and Not-Maud Pie replied, giving one of her extremely rare small smiles.

Pinkie's eyes went wide. She suddenly noticed there were stallions trotting in the background as well. "So...t-this is..."

"The world where they worked the bugs out."

"Really?! Wow! What's her name?"

"Rocky Road! She's so much fun!"

"Sounds like it! What's she like?"

"Well she likes rocks a lot!"

Minty raised an eyebrow. "Rocks?"

"Yeah! She's as big of a collection of rocks as you do of socks!"

Minty gasped in surprise. "Really?! Wow!"

"She also really likes hiking! Oh I can't wait for her to get here!"

Pinkie was crying. "This...this world didn't tear itself apart?"

"No, it never does that," Not-Maud replied. "That is not THIS world's end. This world knew many things yours didn't, Pinkie, but it didn't know the horrors your ended with...I guess in that way it is even more innocent than yours was."

"...So you asked..."

"'What if your world didn't have to end that way.' I wanted you to see a world were your friends got to have their happy endings."

"But it's YOUR party..."

Maud put a hoof over her sister's shoulder and hugged her. "I know, and making you happy is what makes ME happy...This is MY present too."

"Which is also why this potential situation centers around Miss Maud Pie's alternate self," the What-If Machine explained.

After some sisterly hugging and crying, the two turned back to the screen as Pinkie Pie's friends started preparations, which as with all special occasions included trying to reinovate the entire town for a little bit to match the guest of honor's tastes, like the time it was covered in glitter. In this case a lot of rocks were involved.

"...And Pinkie?"

"Yes Maud?"

"...Just because something was erased, that doesn't mean that it wasn't real...that is a fallacy many mistake for truth," a mixture of Maud and Not-Maud said, Not-Maud seeming somewhat annoyed. "Never was isn't the same as fake. Your world was real. That's WHY it was a tragedy to see it die...and why your memories of it aren't a bad thing."

Pinkie nuzzled her sister. "...Thanks..."

"Like I said, making you happy is what makes me happy..."

Pinkie wiped her tears away and turned back to the screen as the other party goers who couldn't see what was on it continued their party as the party girl desired. Rocky Road shared Maud's difficulty conveying emotions, something SHE feared would alienate her from her sister's friends, and which did cause SOME conflict.

"...Can we please watch the whole thing?" Pinkie Pie asked.

"Watching entire scenerios is my primary purpose," said the What If Machine. "I was formally used for anthology episodes. If Maud Pie desires it, I can do so."

Maud nodded. "...Yeah...I actually want to see what happens..."
"I'm happy that you threw such a big party," said Rocky Road, with the faintest of smiles.  "When I saw it, I thought that somepony must have spoiled the surprise."

"Ooh, there's another surprise?" cried Pinkie Pie, bouncing in place.  "What is it, what is it?"

Rocky Road motioned towards another group just arriving from the train station... a large blue-coated pegasus stallion with five adorable colts and fillies following along at his hooves.  "Spooky had some time off work, so we brought everypony along.  This is our first trip with the whole family."

"Gosh, that's a big family!" said Minty.

"It's just how we wanted it," said Rocky Road.  "Minty, everypony, I'd like you to meet my husband, Spooky Tail."

"Howdy," said the stallion.  "Now, you children behave, and try to keep the chaos down to a dull roar.  No more pranks today, Butter Fry."

The grey-coated unicorn colt stamped a hoof.  "But dad, Fire Cracker started it."  He pointed to the red earth pony colt.

"Don't blame me!  It was Rose Quartz's idea."

The pink unicorn filly stuck her tongue out at her brothers.  "Was not.  Right, Flint Spark?"

"Was so!" retorted the rusty-brown earth pony filly.

"Was not!"

"Was so so so!"

"Can we go home yet?" said the green pegasus colt.

Pinkie Pie smiled.  "If you go home now, you won't get to try any of this delicious cake, Sugar Rush."

"Cake?"  The grumpy colt brightened up in a hurry.  "Chocolate cake?"


"Well, I don't want just any chocolate cake.  I want double-chocolate chip ice cream cake!"

Pinkie did a squeaky smile that was familiar in any dimension.  "No problem!"

In the studio, Twilight Sparkle rubbed her eyes and looked at the What-If Machine's screen again.  Unlike most of her friends, she knew all about the Lost World.  "Is that...  No, they couldn't really be..."

"They are," said Maud Pie, almost wistfully.
Twilight blinked. ""

Suddenly, a dimensional portal opened over head and a message dropped in front of her. "Huh?"

'Dear Twilight,

In that universe, I decided that since My Wife was enjoying Herself in that world for the first time...ever that I'd join Her and spend a life as a loving family, and suggested our children join us and have time as a loving family.

Yours truly, Havoc.'

Twilight smiled a bit before looking back to the What If Machine. 'I hope they're happy together.'
Not-Maud Pie looked at the others. "None of you noticed that letter."

Fluttercruel chuckled. 'I just realized something funny mom.'


'If that timeline the TV mentioned was Blue and White becoming Nightmare Phalanx, the Best Defense . . . shouldn't it have been NightSTALLION Phalanx? . . . In short, he didn't just become a Nightmare in that verse, he got turned into a girl!! Ha ha! . . . I wish I could go out there and give Coffee Swirl a piece of my mind, but I know you won't let me leave Gray And Violet's party.'

'Just calm down dear. Nopony is perfect. I'm sure he'll apologize the moment he sees you.'

'He better. At least I have the funny image of Shining Armor as a GIRL NightMARE.'

'Didn't What If say that vision had darkness and violence?'

'Meh. Likely just to some over the top cheesy super-villain nopony actually liked and had no real personality or character or soul.'

'It's still not a good thing to do.'

'Yes mother.'

Far away, Shining Armor shuddered where he and his wife stood in their townhouse in Canterlot.

"What is it, dear?" Cadence nuzzled him. Midnight and Kifuko whinnied softly where they hung in the saddlebags over their mother's sides.

"I was just thinking about all those recent times I've been transformed into a mare," Shiny said. "Usually when visiting Ponyville. And I just had this weird vision of someone wanting to see it happen again."

"Darling," Cadence said, speaking softly, "does it really matter? You got changed back, and myself, well, if it was permanent," blue fire flashed around her and a lithe stallion with Cadence's pink coat and violet mane and tail, "I'd find ways to adapt," Cadence said in a husky male voice.

"Thanks," Shiny said, "but I think I prefer sticking with the original model." Cadence grinned back and returned to her true form.
Pinkie Pie's 4th Wall Breaking Show epi 10 Part 13
Pony POV Series 
Pinkie Pie's 4th Wall Breaking Variety Show episode 10
By Alex Warlorn

Pinkie Pie, " . . . I . . . come on please? Just us six and Maud Pie. Please? Just a little get together with friends and my big sister?. . .  Please? . . . Why did it take 13 parts? This party . . . what is this feeling? It reminds me of when I was on coffee for three weeks . . ." *SOBS* 

Parts added by:
Ardashir and Persona22 with edits by Alex Warlorn 
Alex Warlorn
Ardashir, Kendell2, Adashir, with bits by Alex Warlorn
Alex Warlorn
Alex Warlorn
Alex Warlorn
Kendell2 (with some edits by me)
mtangalion (with a little by me at the end)
Acalanthide and Mtangalion
Ardashir, Dragon of Twilight, and Kendell2
Alex Warlorn

Pinkie Pie, " ... I'm never getting Maud Pie's party am I? NEVER! This is just gonna on and on until the shadows get bored and stop adding parts! .  . . here's the dumb Da Rule":
1. What you put in the comments appears in the story.
2. Nopony besides me can see beyond the fourth wall or interact with it and I can't spill the beans about us being out-and-out fiction to the others.
3. The camera can’t leave the studio.
4. The characters can be from any generation, toy or comic but they have to be from “My little Pony”
5. Everything that happens here is non-canon (except the Tartarus break out thingie, but not the big battle).
6. Have Fun "

Cover by Kendell2
MLP FiM Copyright of Hasbro


Check Out The Pony POV Series
United States
Comic commentary.

It's time for a yearly convention of snack carts in Ponyville (and of course, the Apples are in on the act).

Pinkie Pie begs for Twilight's help to keep her away from Phenomnomenas, "Noms", the ULTIMATE snack treat that is the one sugar bomb that's too much for even Pinkie's stomach.

The problem is that every time they arrived, Pinkie Pie stuffs herself with them to the point of being ill!

So this year Twilight keeps Pinkie Pie inside the castle. First she tries aversion therapy, ice water and snapping with a rubber band, but all this dose is trigger the WANT.

Twilight drags Pinkie Pie back before she snag the prize with a safety harness.

"You'll thank me later."


"Thanks Twilight, hey you were right." *Pinky points at 'Later' box'

Spike, "What is she pointing at?"

Next Twilight goes for chains and locks. Pinkie has a 'prison party' and she hears the jingle from the Noms cart . . . and Pinkie Pie's forth wall breaking power go wonky as she breaks out and turns her escape into a board game the reader could play in theory.

Twilight snags her with her magic and takes her back.

BTW: I just want to say, that Pinkie Pie's nonsense speak and backwards logic REALLY REALLY are turned up to 11 this issue, but given what Pinkie is struggling with, it's likely stress.

And Pinkamena is here.

Pinkamena wants Noms.

Twilight, "You want them, but you really want is to be free of the power they hold over you."

Pinkamena answers that no, she really really REALLY wants the Noms!

Pinkamena says some unfriendly words to Twilight for keeping her away from the Noms.

Twilight invents a kooky complex machine to try to use Pinkie Pie's boundless energy against her. Twilight is in her lab coat and is looking mental.

But when Pinkie Pie figure that if she 'wins' she gets to have the Noms, she breaks out.

Pinkie Pie begins to stuff her face.

Twilight tries one to see what the big deal is.  And . ..  

"No talk! More eat!" Twilight says in the treat's sway as well.

A panel of a pac man parody of snacking down.

Then Twilight with a big belly is disgusted at herself.

"How can something so painful look so good?" Twilight says looking at the delicious treats.

Pinkie responds. "They say you forget the pain. But the pain won't forget me. I'll name it Bulragaurd and feed it more Noms!"

The next or second panel later, is Pinkie Pie not looking happy at all, but still eating. "Bulragaurd! How could you do this to me!?"

The two mares (the two most cute and pretty and frilly ponies you've ever seen) who run the stand NEVER say a word the entire issue. Not one.
Now, at first you can't really blame them, they're just selling a treat, they can't be blamed if Pinkie Pie is filing their coffers by buying a ton of them.
But then they begin to show signs of actively ENCOURAGING Pinkie Pie to continue to stuff her face (and fill their cash bags), regardless of how it's clear that she's doing this as an involuntary addiction. (They're the ones who make the choice to continue to serve Pinkie Pie when it's clear that their product is NOT doing her any good at this point.)

Twilight is broken in that she FAILED Pinkie Pie, but it finally hits Twilight . . . Only Pinkie Pie can stop Pinkie Pie.

So Twilight tells Pinkie Pie she gives up. Pinkie (who doesn't look cute at all with the crumbs and stuffed cheeks at all) asks what's wrong, maybe she and Bulragaurd can help.

Pinkie Pie tells Twilight that Twilight being irrational isn't in character for her, dramatics are Pinkie and Rarity's department.

Twilight tells Pinkie Pie how SHE needs to be one to decide not to eat the Noms.

This causes Pinkamena to pop up again, and Pinkie shows to be going in agony in NOT a pretty way at all . . . before she finally says no to it.

Much to the cheers of many ponies around her.

Pinkie Pie says to lay off the chains and locks next time, but this feels like Pinkie Pie being weird rather her calling out Twilight.

The mares walk away from the snack stands, while the last panel is out Spike indulging in a bunch of sapphire pretzels.
  • Listening to: Pony POV Series
  • Reading: Pony POV Series
  • Watching: Pony POV Series
  • Drinking: nothing

Twilight Sparkle asks of you, Rainbow Dash, "Do you wish to know thew truth?" 

48 deviants said Learn the truth
4 deviants said Remain in ignorance

Journal History



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Persona22 Featured By Owner 6 hours ago…

T: Oh, Pinkie Pie told me about this holiday! It's called Christmas, right? They celebrated it in the Lost World.

S: Lost World?

T: It's a long story... So, how are thing going with you and the rest of the girls?

S: Pretty good. RD is letting me do some guitar solos during the songs, and is calling the Rainbooms "our" band instead of "her" band. Oh! And we also have been trying to get closer to Trixie.

T: Really! That's great! How is that going on for you?

S: It's kind of difficult, at times it seems she wants us to be friends, but at others it's like she's pushing us away, like she's afraid or something...

T: Just keep trying and don't give up on her. It will totally be worth it. If she's anything like my Trixie, she'll be one of the best friends you'll ever have. *slurp* Hmm!

S: *giggles* Twilight, you got a little something under your nose.
Persona22 Featured By Owner 6 hours ago
Equestria Girls MMC-verse Fluttershy:
"Everyone's doing stand up comedy, so I'll try sitting down comedy instead. I have a feeling its gonna be big!"

Equestria Girls MMC-verse Pinkie Pie:
"When life gives you apples, you just make everything out of apples. What? Apples are awesome!"

Equestia Girls MMC-verse Applejack:
"*Yawn* I overworked myself again last night, but I can't stop now, my clients are counting on me! I'll... I'll just rest my eyes for one minute..."
jmcdavid Featured By Owner 13 hours ago
Alex. I'm curious. Was reading out of character a major contributing factor to the depression you fell into a while back?
alexwarlorn Featured By Owner 15 hours ago
For the record, has said he's trying to get an import real life project of his ready before Christmas, so that's where his energy is going right now, and why there hasn't been any progress to the edits.
ardashir Featured By Owner 13 hours ago
Well, real life does come first. Whenever the new chapters get posted we'll be here and delighted to read them.
ardashir Featured By Owner 1 day ago
Say, Alex, here's a rather unique MLP fan story -- Twilight Sparkle, the Interview!…

I'd love to see something like this in the What-If Machine.  A world where the Pony POV is a (televised) series and the actors coming down from an intense take. Would you have any preferences?
Ghidorafour Featured By Owner 1 day ago
Btw just read the equestria girl holiday special (And it was pretty good.)

btw if there were to be a third equestria girl film human twilight would be the villain?
alexwarlorn Featured By Owner 1 day ago
That IMHO would hold the perfect irony. And in the end she'd be given a reality check that magic DOES have rules, they're just not one she's gotten to know yet.
Ghidorafour Featured By Owner Edited 1 day ago
while i do somewhat agree those do occur rather often. i have to disagree that it not THAT commonplace. cause there was a scene in the canterlot changeling invasion that show carrot top/Golden Harvest hugging a small filly with two changeling walking forward in a menacing way. (As seen here) i mean i'm pretty sure that filly was separated from her family yet Carrot top/Golden Harvest still try to comfort her as two changeling walked forward to hurt them regardless of the child and women.… (Pause at 23.)

plus shoo out the clown has been in decline in recent years (Either that or justified.)

point is i understand yet i have to agree with Skeletonbear and Grogar.
alexwarlorn Featured By Owner 1 day ago
When I read how the CMC were 'someplace same far away' in Immortal Games on tropes . . . . let's just say THAT was my inspiration for how the CMC get so caught in the insanity of the changeling invasion and they COULDN'T be neatly swept under the rug. 
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